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grown up children

March 6, 2012

A few weeks ago my youngest niece got married. I haven’t been able to go to many family gatherings for quite a while due to my problems with getting around. I didn’t think I would get to go to Dessie’s wedding until my brother called to say he would arrange to get me there if I wanted to come.

As it turned out, I got to spend some good times with my other nieces as well as my nephews (they were busy with wedding duties, though). I enjoyed the time tremendously. I know my brother’s kids have grown up as much as mine have. For some reason I always envision them at the same age they were when they were visiting us on a regular basis. I know that isn’t so, but that’s an intellectual knowledge. Emotionally I still think of them as ‘kids.’

As much as it surprises me when my son flies from NM to Ohio to get me and take me to visit them, it surprised me to see Jodi doing the same thing from Missouri to Ohio. I was tickled to see Kati with two kids and Luci with two little boys and an ‘almost grown’ daughter. Everyone was being so ‘grown-up’ and efficient. Why that should surprise me I don’t know but it did. And it pleased me.

I felt very much loved too. Rachael always worries about my going off with other people. For quite a few years I’ve needed family and friends to help me: I couldn’t walk very far. I couldn’t stand for any length of time. I needed cars brought to me and in some cases I needed help getting in the vehicle if it was too far off the ground. If I forced myself to walk or stand, my knees simply stopped working and I had the greatest difficulty standing or walking. The pain would be intense and I wouldn’t be able to sleep without taking some serious pain killers.

Rachael didn’t need to worry one single bit with my nieces and nephews! There was always someone asking if I needed something and if they could go get me something. They brought cars close for me to get into and Jodi even turned the car around so I didn’t have to even walk around it! Now I’m even walking without crutches and they still took care of me.

One of the greatest pleasures was finding that Luci is serving the Lord. It was a blessing. I didn’t love the others any less, but I was happy to find her living for God.

Another thing that I enjoyed was seeing my nephews. I’ve only seen pictures of them on Facebook. I haven’t seen Richie for a lot of years—since before I moved to Columbus. That’s at least four years I think. Jole I hadn’t seen for longer than that until he stopped one afternoon last spring while he was in Columbus.

What was fun though was seeing them both in person again. Richie, from his scroungy everyday clothes, was wearing a three piece suite and had his hair and beard nicely trimmed. My first words to him were, “Wow! You clean up nice!” And he did, he looked very nice.

Jole on the other hand honored the occasion by “getting a hair cut.’ I had to giggle privately, because he got one of those hair cuts that can only be described as ‘shaggy and wind-blown.’ I think he did put on a jacket for his duties, but he didn’t neaten up his ‘wind-blown shaggy hair.’ I loved it! He and Richie were like day and night.

But it didn’t matter because the wedding with its beautiful bride serious groom was a mixture of formal and informal, serious and fun. It was one of the nicest weddings I’ve ever attended.
So many times, weddings are so formal and so regimented that there doesn’t seem to be any joy in them. This one was definitely more joyous than formal.

I just didn’t get to spend enough time with everyone. I sat between Luci and Jodi at the dinner afterwards. I was across from Luci’s husband and her two boys. We said nothing of any earth shattering importance but I really enjoyed talking with them all.

It was the way a wedding should be, not too formal, but a wonderful time of connecting with family and friends.

I have to say though that I did miss Grandma Dessie. I didn’t realize until almost the end of the evening that I’d been unconsciously watching for her ever since I saw Pat and Dale Wells arrive. Grandma Dessie was like that, everyone loved her. She was a very loving person.

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